In the broadest sense, conflict is disagreement between two or more people or groups; however, all living things must constantly struggle with their environment and clash when necessary. So this is in our nature.Conflict is not a sign of weak relationship between people, it can always be avoided it is not a situation that can’t be resolved and a situation that is bad.Harvard University Law Department has five different conflict management strategies:
- Recognize that all of us have biased fairness perceptions: Both parties to a conflict typically think they’re right (and the other side is wrong) because they quite literally can’t get out of our own heads. Our sense of what would constitute a fair conflict resolution is biased by egocentrism, or the tendency to have difficulty seeing a situation from another person’s perspective, research by Carnegie Mellon University professors Linda Babcock and George Loewenstein and their colleagues’ shows.
- Avoid escalating tensions with threats and provocative moves: When we feel we’re being ignored or steamrolled, we often try to capture the other party’s attention by making a threat, such as saying we’ll take a dispute to court or try to ruin the other party’s business reputation. There’s a time and place for litigation, but threats and other attention-getting moves, such as take-it-or-leave-it offers, are often a mistake.
- Overcome an “us versus them” mentality: Group connections build loyalty and strong relationships, but they can also promote suspicion and hostility toward members of out-groups. As a result, groups in conflict tend to have an inaccurate understanding of each other’s views and to see the other’s positions as more extreme than they actually are. Whether dealing with conflict as a group or on your own, you can overcome the tendency to demonize the other side by looking for an identity or goal you share. Try to identify and discuss points of similarity between you, such as growing up in the same region. The more points of connection you can identify, the more collaborative and productive your conflict resolution process is likely to be.
- Look beneath the surface to identify deeper issues: Our deepest disputes often seem to involve money: labor disputes over employee wages, family conflicts over assets, for example. Because money is a finite resource, these conflicts tend to be single-issue battles in which one party’s gain will inevitably be the other party’s loss. But disputes over money often involve much deeper causes of conflict such as the feeling that one is being disrespected or overlooked.
- Separate sacred from pseudo-sacred issues: Conflict management can be particularly intractable when core values that negotiators believe are sacred, or nonnegotiable, are involved, such as their family bonds, religious beliefs, political views, or personal moral code. Take the case of two siblings who disagree about whether to sell their deceased parents’ farm, with one of them insisting the land must remain in the family and the other arguing that the parents would want them to sell it. We tend to err on the side of not negotiating when sacred principles and values are at stake, writes Program on Negotiation Chair Robert Mnookin in his book Bargaining with the Devil: When to Negotiate, When to Fight.
The conflict is always and everywhere. With our husband or wife, our child, our manager, our team, our friends…. A study found that employees spend 2.8 hours a week to deal with conflict. The situation is even worse for the managers. There are studies showing that they spend time to deal with conflict up to 40% of their time. In another study, in the last 20 years, rudeness and disrespect at workplaces increased by 13%. Again in a study, tense relationships cause 65% of performance problems.Let’s go through an example. Let’s say a hard email has been received or there was a hard exit at the meeting, how should you manage the conflict?
1. Take some time for yourself: get away from there. Can you give me 5 minutes you may say I will return to you tomorrow. It may seem difficult; but You can do. Because nobody wants to hear hard and negative sentences from you.
2. You may want to take a break: We won’t be able to solve this right now, let’s take a break conversation, you might say.
3. Stop without quickly responding to the email and pressing the send button: Research shows that we are always open, clear and well-intentioned.We see that we are writing, and the email that comes in is rough and malicious. To-do not conflict with the mail. 100% of work in e-mails is in words. Sound,no intonation.
4. Change your perspective: Of course we are not talking about being like Polyanna, but it’s always nice to see something positive. Thinking negative does not solve anything. Consider that the person you will experience conflict may also have reasons for. Is he afraids of losing his job, are there problems in his private life?
5. Clarify what you have to say and what your message will be in advance. Will occur you have more than one scenario against situations.
6. Time and place are important: if you are angry and mentally not ready, wait. Or speak as soon as possible. Let it be a neutral place as a place.There is little risk of irritation and sound amplification in places.
7. Show that you are in cooperation. For example, if you want to get advice. Tell.
8. If the source of the conflict is private, proceed by coaching.
9. Manage your emotions: Your body can also react. A normal and natural sound. Speak with the tone. Do not speak in a way that will annoy the other person.
Conflicts carried out with the right planning and healthy communication, the parties are satisfied leads to a conflict process and mutual cooperation results.
It is possible to specialize in conflict techniques with practice and practice. This competence, which will give much value for the learning and practice time it requires, strengthens the social competencies of the manager, such as listening, observing, empathy, and supports the fact that he is a compromising, successful business person.